I’m back to talk about the latest episode of Project Swarovski Accessory! I can’t believe this is only the 3rd episode. I think that’s kind of telling. Go watch before you read!
The episode opens with a half-naked Storytime David talking about missing his family. He’s “an integral part of their life at home.” Foreshadowing much?
This week’s challenge is to design accessories to turn this ridiculous bodysuit into ‘everyday wear.’ Why? Whyyyyy?
But they’re not all pink. The designers choose one at a time starting with last week’s winner Formerly Creepy James. He picks pink! Seriously?! But he chooses Church Hat Adrian to pick next because he was in the bottom last week, so that was sweet. I just can’t figure you out, James.
Rich is third to choose and does the only smart thing by choosing the black bodysuit as does Christina who follows him. I can’t understand how the black ones didn’t go first. Everyone else chooses and David gets stuck with pink, the one color he didn’t want.
After a brief sketching period the designers head to Mood for their first shopping trip. They have $100 and 20 minutes. I was surprised that Eva wasn’t there because Tim always goes shopping with the Project Runway designers. Or maybe she was and it was just too boring to show.
Back in the workroom everyone goes crazy at the Swarovski Elements wall and I just go crazy because oy, enough already. I like crystals but I’m tired of seeing them on every. single. piece.
The next few minutes, during which I’d love to see THE DESIGNER’S WORKING, are dedicated to camel toe. Rock ‘n Roll Nicolina is obsessed with it, David doesn’t know what it is, blah blah blah.
WTF? Shut up Nicolina!
Eva comes around to check on their work and finds Shea “having a moment.” I think Shea is about to unravel, but she’s wearing a really cute shirt. Anyone know where I can get it? That’s the real reason I included this picture
I was also confused by Eva’s advice to Rich (who declared this a “challenging challenge” heh) to make the bodysuit wearable and not just a background. It probably did stop him from making a horrible belt, but what does that advice even mean? It’s a spandex bodysuit- it is what it is. How can it be anything besides background?
Before she leaves Eva tells the designers that it’s a double elimination week. Ruh-roh!
Back in the apartment it looks like everyone just stumbled home from the bar rather than the workroom. Nicolina acts crazy and says they shouldn’t help other designers who are making mistakes.
Which is hilarious because her belt with the olive green “pop of color” and strings hanging between the legs ON PURPOSE is the very definition of a mistake.
Showtime! The adorable and likeable Kelly Osborne guest judges. I approve.
Christina goes first and looks pretty good. I would have left the crystals off of the belt but I like the turban and relatively simple designs. She sure gt lucky landing a black bodysuit, though.
Hey Post-Apocalyptic Brian, where have you been all episode? Busy making this weird stuff I guess.
I’m pretty impressed with Church Hat Adrian even though I’m mad at him for not making a freaking hat yet. I wouldn’t wear any of this stuff but it looks consistent and manages to make the bodysuit palatable.
I know that the world is totally over this, but I have to channel Christian Siriano because Shea’s model is a hot mess.
Nina’s look just didn’t come together. The belt is hanging on to the model’s lack of hips for dear life- I really thought it might just fall down on the runway. The bracelet is cute but there really isn’t anything original or interesting going on. Haven’t we seen enough zipper accents and jewelry already?
WTF is this?
I’m torn about Rich. His look is consistent, well-crafted and unique but I just don’t love it. The ring is great, though, and he’s clearly a talented craftsman. If I ever go to Burning Man I’ll totally copy this look, but until then…
Designers, see how Rich used the Swarovski Elements wall in a tasteful, modern way? More of this and less Bedazzle-ing, please.
Team Diego! Hate the belt but the rest is clean, modern perfection.
Tragic. The center fringe belt is just inexplicable.
Time for judging! James is off the hook because he has immunity and Adrian, Brian and Nina are all safe.
That leaves this cast of characters. The judges love Christina and Rich’s work… interesting since they had the black bodysuits, isn’t it? They are split about Diego- Molly and Kelly love the “dangerous” jewelry but Ariel and Kenneth aren’t convinced. Diego confessed that it’s his first necklace!
They declare Christina the winner and she does a crazy walk into the workroom while stripping her blazer off.
Back on the runway Storytime David explains that his girl is named Kristen and she lives in Aspen. Kenneth isn’t buying it, though, and says he’s been to Aspen and has never seen Kristen. Hah. His legwarmers are the lowlight but the hat, necklace and belt are all strange and none of them really make sense together.
Kelly finds the whole look hilarious. Storytime David is out and heads home to see his family. We’re down to Nicolina and Shea.
The judges think that Shea’s look has too much going on and isn’t cohesive. Kelly points out that none of it is finished properly. I wish they’d have talked about the styling- what is going on with her hair? The whole thing makes me question her taste.
And then Kelly compares Nicolina’s belt with the strings between the legs to a tampon. Ouch. They have the model rotate the belt to one side and it looks a million times better (but still ugly). Nicolina interviews that perhaps she was too concerned with covering up the model’s crotch which is true and also makes no sense since her look actually manages to draw attention to it.
Molly announces that Nicolina is out and Shea is totally surprised. She starts promising to do better and it feels like a desperate girl convincing her boyfriend to stay with her. Molly tells her to leave the runway.
So that’s it- what did you think? I’m pretty disappointed with the challenges so far but I’m not sure what a good challenge would be. I’m going to think about it this week and next week I’ll tell you what I came up with. What kind of challenge would you like to see?
(Btw, all of these pictures were taken from Lifetime. I like your show, don’t sue me!)